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Democrats waste $20 million to learn why they lost men. Here's my free advice. | Opinion

I hate to break it to Democrats, but it will take a lot more than 'code talk' and beards to win back men.

Let me tell you the tale of two beards. (Yes, beard, as in male facial hair.)

Both cases say a lot about what’s wrong with the Democratic Party and its struggles to hold on to men – particularly young men.  

It started last summer when then-candidate Donald Trump chose Ohio Sen. JD Vance for vice president. It seemed that all some people wanted to talk about … was Vance’s beard.

Democrats and their mouthpieces in the media did not appreciate Vance's renegade move to sport whiskers while serving in the political realm. Take this July 2024 Politico Magazine treatise, “Yes, JD Vance’s beard matters. Here’s why.” 

The author talks about how for decades beards were seen as “unprofessional and unhygienic,” before pivoting to how “more recent research has shown that voters perceive facial hair as deeply masculine, which can come with both positive connotations (like competence) and negative ones (like aggression and less support of feminist issues).”

In other words, Vance’s beard indicates a toxic masculinity vibe, according to progressive logic.

Vice President JD Vance delivers a keynote address on May 28, 2025, in Las Vegas.

Fast-forward to now, when former Biden Transportation Secretary Pete Buttigieg – who is a Democrat – is getting very different treatment in response to his fresh lumberjack look.

A recent piece in Slate that focuses entirely on Buttigieg’s beard notes people are finding the new facial hair sexy and how beards in general are a “particularly powerful tool” and a “vehicle for personal transformation.” 

Is Buttigieg indeed trying on the beard to better appeal to men whom Democrats are losing, as he mulls another run for president

Therein lies the problem with both hairy tales – or at least a big part of it. 

Democrats' messaging is turning off American men. Will studying male voters help?

In essence, Vance’s beard received ridicule from the left because it appeared “too manly” and must have misogynistic meaning (he is a Republican, after all).

And now it appears that Buttigieg’s advisers may believe he could persuade more men to give Democrats a chance by sporting facial hair. 

Former Transportation Secretary Pete Buttigieg calls on an audience member to ask a question during a town hall hosted by VoteVets on May 13, 2025 in Cedar Rapids, Iowa.

Is it any wonder many men are finding all this a turnoff? Can’t a beard just be a beard?

Democrats’ devotion to appearance, gender, race and identity in general may appeal to the party’s base, but it has ostracized a wide swath of men. Trump made gains across the demographic board in 2024 with this voting bloc, and Democrats are worried.

That’s why they are spending $20 million to study how best to talk to men, first reported last month by The New York Times. “Speaking with American Men: A Strategic Plan” or “SAM” will study “the syntax” and “language” of young male voters and prioritize a “shift from a moralizing tone.” 

Democrats could have saved themselves a lot of money if they’d just come to me for advice. There are so many examples of what they did wrong in the past election.

Men want respect. They don't want to be given 'permission' to vote for someone.

When then-Vice President Kamala Harris took Joe Biden’s place on the presidential ticket in July, the campaign centered on her race and her gender – and all the “firsts” a Harris presidency would mean. Fundraising efforts like “White Dudes for Harris” doubled down on her identity.

In fact, just days before Harris chose Minnesota Gov. Tim Walz as her running mate, he appeared on the “White Dudes” call and said this of the upcoming election: “How often in the world do you make that bastard (Trump) wake up afterwards and know that a Black woman kicked his ass and sent him on the road?”

More recently, Walz has said that the Harris campaign wanted him on board because, as a White male, he could “code talk” with other White males and men in general and serve as the "permission structure" to vote for a woman of color.  

This blatant push to give men “permission” or cover to vote for Harris obviously backfired. One ad on behalf of Harris featured actor George Clooney narrating a message that chided tough-looking dudes to vote for Harris, underscoring they shouldn’t give in to pressure to support Trump.

Data guru Nate Silver in a recent post detailed some of the reasons Democrats are struggling with men. 

He noted a study that showed conservatives who report excellent mental health outnumber liberals 51% to 20%. Among Generation Z, born between 1997 to 2012, the mental health gap between men and women is 17 points (38% of men report very good or excellent mental health compared with 21% of women). 

It wasn't by coincidence that a New York Times/Siena College poll reported in August that among voters ages 18 to 29, there was a 24-point gender gap between male and female Trump voters. 

Silver concludes that “it’s those who report relatively high mental health and see Democrats as being too neurotic and perhaps constraining their opportunity to compete and reap the rewards of their work” who are leaving liberal identity politics and the diversity-fueled victimhood mentality by the wayside. And they are more likely to be men. 

The majority of men (and many conservative women) voted for Trump not because of what he looked like or what identity boxes he checked off. They liked what he promised for the economy and the security of our border.

I hate to break it to Democrats, but it will take a lot more than “code talk” and beards to win back men.

Ingrid Jacques is a columnist at USA TODAY. Contact her at ijacques@usatoday.com or on X: @Ingrid_Jacques